Farewell, 2015

Look at you

It's the end of 2015

 and you've survived everything up until this point

and you're still here.

 If that's not an accomplishment, I don't know what is

***

I've had this blog for over a year now, and even now, I have no idea where this all is going to go.
I still have no idea where I'll end up, what I'll end up writing, or who all is going to be here when
I do, but for the time being I'm really happy that I traded my notebooks and half dried pens for all
of you, and I'm so glad that you all have stayed to listen to my ramblings about bands and
my silly life and that you haven't jumped out of the boat, no matter how many ridiculous
obsessions I've acquired over the year.

I've watched a lot of you change and grow, and I've seen a lot of people come and go in the
community, but I'm proud of you all who have stayed and have learned a lot about yourself
and the people around you in the process.

As of the end of 2015, I have 67 followers, 20,000 pageviews, and 1,246 comments.
That's insane.
Coming from someone who never thought I'd get more than 1 follower or make it over
ten views in my little corner of the internet, that is absolutely insane and it means so much
just wow what do I even do with that information, have a hug and a cupcake, all of you

Anyway, it's been quite a while, but here is my little jar for 2015.

***

I've continued to work on my little jar project the past 12 months, and
it's actually gone quite well

To say the least, I've very proud of where I am now compared to the 

mess I had buried myself under just a few short years ago.

I'm no longer overwhelmed by my silly, negative thoughts that I've left

far behind me in the dust, and have a whole new outlook on life.

In the words of The Great All Time Low, I like to tell myself that

I'm 'safe from the weight of the world' in a sense. 

It's comforting for some reason

The whole purpose of this project was to keep myself from all those negative

thoughts and to learn to love myself for once in my life, and for the first time ever,

I'm honestly able to say that I am comfortable with my body and my mind.

Of course, little pieces of my old frame of mind will come crawling back to me

every once and while, but I'm finally strong enough to not let those

thoughts overwhelm me and keep me from living, and that means the absolute

world to me, you don't even know.

This year, I decided to fold all my little pieces of papers, with little happy moments

or events from every day of the year, into little stars, since stars in general have a 

really special meaning to me after a big thing happened when I was little.

It's comforting in a strange way to watch this little jar fill up with little paper

things that would finally make me tear up at the end of the year with all the silly

things that I thought were exciting enough to write down before crashing in bed 

for the night.

They weren't very big things, but they were very important all the same

I'm very happy to have collected all of my little stars, and I can't wait to continue

to do so for the next year.

Who knows where my next jar will take me.

I've read last year's New Year post over and over again the past 24 hours

in order to get some ideas for this year's big finish, but I ended up laughing

at Me From the Past, telling myself that there's no way 2015 could be any better than 2014.

Oh, younger me, you don't even know.

It's going to be so much better.

***

"Before I spam you with more firework gifs than anyone could ever ask for, I guess I should try and type up a list of resolutions/goals/reminders since this is really the only time of the year I'm motivated to improve myself. Wish me luck." -me, 2014

(google wants to edit 'gifs' to 'figs' and i cant stop laughing, why am i like this, i swear im 3)

This year I've decided to not write any resolutions or anything.

And that's not because I've failed last year's resolutions, because guess what??

I've accomplished all 16 goals from last year.

LADIES AND GENTS, FOR THE FIRST TIME EVER, I'VE ACTUALLY
ACCOMPLISHED SOMETHING. xD

But in all seriousness, my only goal for 2016 is to keep going. To keep exploring, keep

creating, and to keep learning. I've grown a whole lot in 2015, and the biggest thing I've

learned about myself this past year, is that if I want to grow, I can't force myself to learn

things and explore and have a good time, I have to let everything fall in place. As long as I'm 

still here at the end of next year, that's all I could ever hope for.

BUT IF YOU THINK I'M NOT GOING TO SPAM ALL YOU LOVELY

MUFFINS WITH FIREWORK GIFS (*figs), YOU ARE SO VERY WRONG MY FRIEND.

***

***

Have a wonderful year, you guys.

I've had the best year I could've ever hoped for, and I've got so much more to

explore, and I hope you all get to do plenty of that yourselves.

Go make things, go listen to some music, go find new artists, go fall in love with

yourself and other people, go share ideas and learn about the world, and travel, and everything.

Just go do everything, that sounds good.

Just take care of yourselves out there in the big world, okay? 

“May your coming year be filled with magic and dreams and good madness. I hope you read some fine books and kiss someone who thinks you're wonderful, and don't forget to make some art -- write or draw or build or sing or live as only you can. And I hope, somewhere in the next year, you surprise yourself.” 

-Neil Gaiman

Have a wonderful year, lovelies. <3 <3 <3

AND DON'T FORGE TO EAT LOTS OF FRUIT (ESPECIALLY PINEAPPLE)

DON'T DO DRUGS, STAY IN SCHOOL

AND READ A LOVELY BOOK FOR ME

HAPPY 2016 MY LITTLE MUFFINS

<3

***

2014 Feels Attack

My first thought was 'no'

'Why would you want a blog'

'Like anyone would ever read it'

'I'm sure there are better things to do with your time'

'It would be like talking to an empty room, what's the point?'

* * *

I had started this blog in June this year, not knowing where it would go.

I had no idea where I would end up, what all I would write about, or who all would actually read it, but at the time I just needed a blank sheet of paper. Somewhere where I could ramble about my fandoms and rant about my life.

I made the blog public in October to try and get a few more pageviews and gain and couple followers during my little blogging journey. I'll admit, I was a little pageview hungry as most new bloggers are, but although I didn't get the 10,000 views I imagined or the 3,000 comments per post, I got something better.

You guys

You all made my 2014 with all your comments and support over the past couple months, and I can't tell you what that means to me. I certainly don't have the photography skills some of you guys have, and I can't even handle how sweet and caring you all are, I couldn't ask for better followers.

* * *

I've been working on something this year.

I never really mentioned it to anyone, since it's been a 'personal progress' kind of thing, but now that it's finished, I decided to share.

2013 was an...interesting year for me

On December 31, 2013 as I was waiting with my family in our living room for the ball to drop in Times Square, I decided 2014 was going to be better. I was going to work harder on improving myself and for once, I was actually going to put some effort into those changes. See, I kinda hated who I was and what I'd become that year and was going through some emotional struggles and I was completely ready in that moment as the ball dropped to completely revamp my life and start over.

There were a lot of changes to be made.

But the biggest thing I wanted to change was my negative outlook on the world

On January 1, 2014, I pulled out a jar and decorated it

It was nothing special, but I was pretty happy with it at the time, and so my journey began

Every day for the next 365 days, I would cut a slip of paper, not much bigger than my thumb and I would write something good that happened that day

They didn't have to be big things, and most of them really weren't

2-25-14 - Drew a lot today :)

2-1-14 - Bought a new Doctor Who t-shirt

1-12-14 - Painting a scene from tangled

6-15-14 - Went to see Maleficent

Over the course of the year, the jar was filled and all my little amazing moments that had made my day slowly built up in my little jar

I had no idea how much that would do for me

Today, on December 31, 2014, I filled the jar

365 slips of paper

365 reasons why 2014 was an amazing year

It's now finished, full of moments I will never forget now because I learned to appreciate the tiniest things like going to my little brother's school performances or eating ice cream with my family or getting to talk for a few minute to a friend I hadn't seen in years

I will be opening it tonight to read all the little slips of paper before the ball drops once more in Times Square and relive all those little moments

I learned so much about myself and the world around me this year

One of the big things I learned was from Anne Frank,

“How wonderful it is that nobody need wait a single moment before starting to improve the world.”

And that includes not only the world around you, but your world, too 

Honestly, 2014 was the best year for me

I don't recall much from the previous years, and I regret that now

But I can't tell you how excited I am to start the 2015 jar

* * *

I mentioned in a post awhile back that New Year's Eve was one of my all time favorite holidays

Still accurate. xD

Before I spam you with more firework gifs than anyone could ever ask for, I guess I should try and type up a list of resolutions/goals/reminders since this is really the only time of the year I'm motivated to improve myself. Wish me luck. xD

1. “To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment.” ~Ralph Waldo Emerson - Be myself. Don't worry about what the world thinks, because they are all too busy worrying the same thing about themselves to worry about you. Inspire others with your individuality.

2. “And above all, watch with glittering eyes the whole world around you because the greatest secrets are always hidden in the most unlikely places. Those who don't believe in magic will never find it.” ~Roald Dahl - Look for the magic in everything. Not just in big things, or little things. Everything holds magic if you just look for it.

3. “The way I see it, every life is a pile of good things and bad things. The good things don’t always soften the bad things, but vice versa, the bad things don’t always spoil the good things and make them unimportant.” ~11th Doctor - There will always be the good and bad moments in life, but don't put too much focus on either one. You will feel better remembering the good things, but you also need to learn from the bad things.

4. “I don’t know a perfect person. I only know flawed people who are still worth loving.” -John Green - Love everyone you happen to meet. Flaws and all. 

5. “When it gets dark enough, you can see the stars.” -Ralph Waldo Emerson - Remember, just like how you wish it was light when you can't see walking through the dark, you only learn to really appreciate the things you have when you've been through situations when you don't have those things. 

 6. “Read books. Care about things. Get excited. Try not to be too down on yourself. Enjoy the ever present game of knowing.” -Hank Green - Don't let society tell you that you can't be excited about things you love. Don't let them tell you that the things you love aren't important. They were the things that built you. 

7. “Be soft. Do not let the world make you hard. Do not let the pain make you hate. Do not let the bitterness steal your sweetness.” -Kurt Vennegut - In the words of Dr. Wayne Dyer, when given the choice between being right or being kind, choose kind.

8. “Well it’s simple to love someone,” she said. “But it’s hard to know when you need to say it out loud.” -WYRM, Rebecca Stead - Always tell the people you love that you love them. You don't know what all they're going through, and you don't know how much it will mean to them or when it could potentially save a life.

9. "900 years of time and space and I've never met anyone who wasn't important." ~The Doctor - Everyone is important. There isn't a person in the world who isn't here for a reason. You included.

10. “The best way to spread Christmas cheer is singing loud for all to hear.” -Elf - Happiness is contagious; spread it this year.

11. “If someone makes you feel bad for the bands you listen to or the way you take your coffee or how you wear your hair or what you wear or the way your laugh sounds then drop them and go find someone who thinks your laugh sounds like the best song they’ve ever heard and offers to make your coffee for you and thinks you dress like art.” -Tumblr user Koalatea - Pretty self explanatory. If anyone makes you feel bad for the things you like or treats you like trash, leave and find someone who will accept you for who you are and someone who you will be happy with.

12. Go without sugar as many days as possible.

13. Listen to music every day.

14. Run at least 2 miles a week.

15. Start a vlog (Something I've been wanting to do for years and finally have the camera/software for it. You know how Teddy from Good Luck Charlie had those video diaries? *go Kelsey finding all her inspiration from old Disney channel shows* That's kinda what I was planning. I won't be posting them anywhere, but I'm still excited.)

16. Go outside every day. I know this is a little like number 14, but this is different I swear. Instead of just running, I want to take some time every day, even if it's just five minutes to sit and write out in the backyard, to be by myself for a little bit, no computer or anything, and get to know myself a little better.

I'll probably come up with more over the next few days 

But for now 16 is enough for me. xD

* * * 

I hope 2014 went wonderfully for all of you and hope that 2015 will be even better

2014 was a big step for me and was truly a phenomenal year and I hope you all can say the same

Thanks for following me and being a part of my little blogging journey. There's a whole new year ahead of blogging for me to tackle, and I've got a whole lot planned and can't wait to share.

 

“May your coming year be filled with magic and dreams and good madness. I hope you read some fine books and kiss someone who thinks you're wonderful, and don't forget to make some art -- write or draw or build or sing or live as only you can. And I hope, somewhere in the next year, you surprise yourself.” 
-Neil Gaiman

And now back to the old routine xD
EAT LOTS OF PINEAPPLES AND OTHER FRUITS TOO STAY HEALTHY
DON'T DO DRUGS
AND READ A LOVELY BOOK FOR ME


Happy 2015
<3

~