end of the day - one direction

this song is great because a.) it puts me in a really giddy, happy mood and b.) me liking this song contradicts everything I said about how pop music was awful, blah blah blah, and all that when I was in 6th grade (I know you were still learning, 6th Grade Me, but hoo boy your whole 'I'm not like other girls' attitude was really unnecessary) so jokes on you, 6th Grade Me

Anyway, this is the beginning of 'Project Atlas', something I will be talking about soon? I'm not sure when?? I don't have the post ready yet, I meant to post that one before this one, but I finished this first and was way too excited about it to wait, so here it is. You should see the placeholder picture for the other post

I tried really hard

That's all I got for today. I hope your week is going well so far and that finals are going well for you all, the years almost over, you got this (at least in America, everywhere else, good luck man) And since it's been actual months, for old times' sake,

DON'T FORGET TO DRINK LOTS OF WATER

EAT LOTS OF PINEAPPLE AND FRUIT, STAY HEALTHY KIDS

AND READ A WONDERFUL BOOK FOR ME

(and happy mothers day!!)

_          _          _

this week's playlist

Send My Love (to your new lover) - Adele | End of the Day - One Direction | Addict With a Pen - Twenty One Pilots | You Are More - Tenth Avenue North | Ships In The Night - Mat Kearney | Over My Head - The Fray | When You Can't Sleep At Night - Of Mice and Men | Touch - Sleeping At Last | In The Absence of Everything, I Promise to Keep You Warn - Flatsound | Tiny Glowing Screens Part II - Watsky | What It Costs - Switchfoot | R.I.P. 2 My Youth - The Neighborhood | The World At Large - Modest Mouse | The Calendar - Panic! at the Disco | Landslide - Oh Wonder

● Day 123 ●

it's days like these that make me feel really lucky to be alive.

_          _          _

I've been doing this thing on my side blog on tumblr this year where every day
I post a photo/photoset of pictures of that day. It's sort of a photojournal I guess? They're all very simple, but I love sharing them so much. Anyway, I decided
to post some on here too. Not every single day, but maybe just a couple of my favorites from that month or something like that, we'll see how this all turns out.

also, I have a challenge if any of you are currently out of post inspiration/just feel like procrastinating and going through your own pictures: sum up the world the best you can with only ten pictures in your camera roll

I hope you all are having a great day out there <3

this week's playlist

Matomrie - Baptiste & Monta | Take Your Guess (alternative version) - Tom Rosenthal | Things That Stop You Dreaming - Passenger | Wildflowers - Tom Petty | Pstereo - Emilie Nicolas | Peaches - In The Valley Below | Art School Wannabe - Sorority Noise | The Night Will Save Us - The Strumbellas | anywayican - WALK THE MOON | Give Me A Try - The Wombats | The Village, The Wolf and The Boy - Taylor Berrett | In The Morning - Keaton Henson | Rain Clouds - The Arcadian Wild | I Am - AWOLNATION | Seeing Stars - BORNS | Don't Let Me Down - The Chainsmokers + Daya | Symphonia IX (My Wait Is U) - Grimes | Drifting - On An On | About The Weather - Tom Rosenthal | Half The World Away - AURORA | The Mason - Tossing Copper | Lying to You - Keaton Henson

(I have over 100 songs in this playlist actually, so if you want to see them all here it is. I'm working on trying to avoid making the playlist longer than the post itself)

Vulnerable

About a year ago, in my English class, every unit we focused on a certain question and during the unit we were supposed to figure out how the stories we read and the lives we lived connected to the question. One unit I struggled when the question was along the lines of “how do words have meaning?” I didn’t do the greatest in that unit, and in attempt to recover from the many low C’s that I received when I couldn’t describe how words have power and meaning, I wanted to recap a moment from one of my vacations to answer the question, 'what does vulnerability mean to you?'

To me, vulnerability is standing 5,000 feet in the air, enclosed in a colossal cloud that hides the deadly precipice just feet away from my shaking knees without a hand to hold

Vulnerability is stumbling around in the mist, groping around for a strong branch to keep me upright, the shrubbery giving me a false sense of security, hiding me from the real danger

The Webster dictionary defines vulnerable as an adjective meaning ‘susceptible to physical or emotional attack or harm’, but it sounds so much less dangerous than it feels

To answer your question, Mr. P, and to reclaim the points I lost when I had let myself answer, unaware of what it’s like in the real world and how words can change someone and have more meaning than just their definition, experience is just one of the things that can give meaning to words.

Vulnerable is just one of the things I felt while crawling down the rugged path, but not in a million years could the Webster dictionary accurately describe how hard my heart was pounding, or the numbness and buzzing in my feet, or the knot in my stomach, just imagining what it would be like to suddenly trip if there happened to be a single twig out of place. My entire life I’ve told everyone and even myself that I wasn’t afraid of heights, but for just a moment, I knew what it was like to be truly afraid of falling to your death.

~ ☁ ~

Idk man. I don't know what this was. I just needed an excuse to use these pictures and to try and calm myself down while still thinking of how horrible I did in that unit a whole freaking year ago.

I wrote this about two months ago, but never really found the courage to actually post it because this really isn't my thing??? It doesn't even really make sense, but I hope you enjoy anyway. xD

Anyway, I also did this in video form, if that's your kinda thing. I apologize in advance for my voice. xD Also, I don't have the world's greatest mic, so it's really soft, so sorry about that too. 

THANKS FOR READING WHATEVER THIS WAS

EAT LOTS OF FRUIT STAY HEALTHY KIDS

DRINK LOTS OF WATER STAY HYDRATED TOO

AND READ A WONDERFUL BOOK FOR ME.

~     ~     ~

Btw, this was filmed near Mount Wai'Ale'Ale in Hawaii, 'one of the wettest spots on earth' (it really was, too). The video footage and all photos in this post are mine, and I'd really appreciate it if they weren't used without credit/permission Thank you!! ^_^

back to school (a totally legit tutorial)

so before school actually starts, usually a couple weeks before the first day, I get to tag along with my family to buy school supplies and cry into bowls of ice cream (especially this year, because I get to cry about college stuff). Thankfully, I still have a good week yet before that happens, but since August is the month when most people start heading off to their first week of classes, I decided to write a totally legit tutorial on getting yourself ready to get back to school, inspired by Tadelesmith. Also, quick note, I wrote this in July right before I left to go on that one trip and never actually edited anything before posting, so if there’s any horrible typos or errors in general, I’m sorry, please bear with me.

~     ~     ~

STEP ONE: PREPARATION – buying school supplies

Buying school supplies is actually the best part of getting ready for school in my opinion because heck yeah new pencils and fabulous blank notebooks and all that crap, the only actual thing to worry about at this time is running into old “friends” from school last year. In attempt to woo these people, showing them all how much cooler you have gotten over the summer months, I suggest dressing yourself in the latest “trendy” outfits, wearing dark glasses, and surrounding yourself with bodyguards to avoid getting beat up. Or, if you’re like me and are too lazy to go to all that trouble, you can just show up in your pajamas to show the world how you’ve really been living the past couple months.

This works too

STEP TWO: GOING TO THE STORE

Go to the nearest Staples, Target, Walmart (if u do go to Walmart pls say hi to me. Ill be hiding with the squirrels in the nearest trash can), or wherever your family drags you as you sob, still in your pajamas. Pick out the cheapest pack of pencils and notebooks, because your mom told you that we’re on a budget and $7.99 is absolutely ridiculous for a notebook you’re just going to be using to glue down pictures of Gerard Way to stare at while in science, while checking off the items on the supplies list with the cheesy cartoon pencil border your school gave to you to make sure you’re totally prepared for the year.

STEP THREE: REGRET

You should be about halfway done picking out all of your school supplies and you don’t think this is going all that bad and you’re just about to go down the other aisle to get a spray can of Bob’s Boys-Be-Gone for the year when one of the popular girls from your school who laughed at you when you got water up your nose when getting a drink at the water fountain comes around the corner, talking to her friend. Hide behind one of those big displays of pens they have in the middle of the aisles that always block your parents’ carts and grab as many sharpies you can get your hands on. Immediately draw a mustache and various stripes and dots on yourself in order to make yourself completely unrecognizable. In fact, just draw all over yourself. Go wild. Because let’s be honest, you’re probably going to be doing this to yourself halfway through the year anyway during your biannual ‘I’m supposed to be studying for finals but I can’t even see straight anymore’ breakdowns. Might as well start early this year.

STEP FOUR: RETREAT

As soon as the girls are at a safe 50 mile distance away from you, emerge from your sharpie pen fort and look for your mom who, probably at this point, has already checked out and left you. On your way, head to the ice cream isle. It’s the end of summer, so they should have a good 20% off sale going on about now. Grab as many tubs of ice cream you can get. Scratch that. Just sit inside in freezer and eat the ice cream right out of the tub while sobbing.

STEP FIVE: ESCAPE

At this point, you’ll probably realize that you’d probably make a better living selling hot dogs on the side of the road than you would crying in a classroom over a test packet. Go to the nearest costume shop and buy yourself a good disguise. Acquire a brand new identity and run away to first jungle you can find on Vacation.com and start building your treehouse to live with the monkeys. Goodbye Civilization.  

~     ~     ~

(inspired by)

some of you are already in school

be careful out there, brave soldiers

Who knows what this post was. xD

But really, good luck all of you this year, whether you're going into 4th grade, 8th grade, or 10th grade, or just preparing for uni, I really hope you all have a wonderful year. 

Just don't get murdered, I need someone to join my 'Cry Over Bands With Me' club and I have like 2 friends irl. xD

I start next week, so my blogging schedule may go from 'a new post every hour when she needs to be studying' to 'is she still alive' so no promises that I will get much on here the next nine months, but we'll see how this all goes.

ANYWHO, HAVE A WONDERFUL DAY

DRINK LOTS OF WATER FOR ME

EAT LOTS OF PINEAPPLES

STAY IN SCHOOL, DONT MURDER ANYONE

AND HAVE A FABULOUS DAY <3

Girl Talk

~     ☁    ~

There's something I've been meaning to say for quite some time now, but was never brave enough to, since this isn't really the kind of thing I usually post. So here's to hoping this doesn't turn out too horrible. I would usually have an intro to things like this, but for now, I'm just going to jump right in.

There’s nothing wrong with girls who are ‘popular’. There’s nothing wrong with girls who wear lots of makeup. There’s nothing wrong with girls who dance to pop music. There’s nothing wrong with girls who like to get their nails done or go out and party with their friends or who date a lot of guys or who are really careful picking out their outfits to look good every day.

There’s nothing wrong with girls who are “”different””. There’s nothing wrong with girls who listen to heavy rock or bands no one has even heard of. There’s nothing wrong with girls who show up at school in sweatpants and a t-shirt. There’s nothing wrong with girls who don’t go out a lot and spend a lot of time on the internet.

There's nothing wrong with girls who think they're 'too skinny' or 'too fat'. And there's nothing wrong with girls who are big or little. There's nothing wrong with girls who have an hourglass figure, or are shaped like an apple or a pear. Your body type doesn't determine how 'pretty' you are or your self worth. 

And while we’re on the topic, girls shouldn’t be in constant competition with each other. Girls shouldn’t be taught to hate each other because they’re “different” or because they like different things. Girls shouldn’t be taught that they have to look a certain way in order to be special or ‘pretty enough’.  Every girl is beautiful and strong, no matter their race, religion, sexuality, body type, or what they look like or what their interests are. Everyone here now has worked hard to become who they are today, and shouldn’t be ridiculed for that. 

I haven't seen any hate towards other girls or anything on here, and I'm proud of that. But I still see it every day, so I still feel like it needs to be said. Don't put down other girls. Don't compare yourself to other girls. Love yourself and other girls alike. Also, as a girl, don't think that you have to dress up and spend your entire life trying to impress a boy. If you want to dress up or look nice, do it for yourself and not solely because you want to impress someone or compete with other girls out there. My entire life I've been told the complete opposite; that as a girl my life goal was to find a boy and marry him and have a family while looking better than all the other girls around me, and that was it. I know some of my old friends are still in that mindset, that that really is their purpose in life, but I don't blame them, because for a long time I thought the same.

In short

Anyway, sorry about the little rant, and sorry I haven't been posting, and sorry I haven't even replied to the comments on the last post, I'll be doing that soon, this has just been stuck in my mind for the past few months and I needed to let it out. I guess this does count as the first 'red journal' post, since it is all in there, so tada. xD 

I hope you've been having a wonderful week so far. ^__^

It's almost over, don't worry, you just have a couple more days to go through, we'll make it through. ^-^

EAT LOTS OF PINEAPPLES, STAY IN SCHOOL, DRINK LOTS OF WATER, SAY HI TO YOUR PETS, AND READ A MAGICAL BOOK FOR ME.

~     ☁     ~

"Do not try to be pretty. You weren’t meant to be pretty; you were meant to burn down the earth and graffiti the sky. Don’t let anyone ever simplify you to just “pretty.”"

Wordy Updates and The Meaning of Life

So lately I've just sort of been

It's been an interesting past week

Last Friday I went to a hockey game with my brother's class where I was on the big screen twice

The first time, I was cleaning and putting on my glasses

The second time, I was prepared and did the famous danisnotonfire-point-and-click thing

so that was fun

Another thing that happened was I was sitting in this little cafe with my family, drawing while I finished up eating when one of the waitresses came by to take my plate, noticing my artwork scattered all over my chair. About ten minutes later after she left, the cafe owner came by and asked if I wanted to do an art show at their cafe

It took everything in me not to start crying right there

I need to get painting soon

Also,

I GOT A DAVIANTART

I'm probably going to be just as horrible posting on there as I have been on here recently, but I'm hoping to get more stuff up

YET ANOTHER THING

There are now 44 of you lovelies following me

I don't know exactly how or when this happened but I am overwhelmed by this

It was only a few months ago I remember there being like 7 of you

Maybe some of you remember the little flower that I drew for you all

So here is a horrible picture of a slightly more extravagant flower for all of you sticking with me for so long

It means the world to me

Here's to millions of even more extravagant flowers in the future

<3

LAST UPDATE

(I promise)

I'm sure most of you have already read on Adi's blog her post about the future and how life will all tie together and how scary the future can be

I just happened to be going through the same exact thing, and was surprised at all the comments saying how it's the same for many of you

So here's my little addition. xD

I'm pretty dang terrified of the future

Both the near future, the next school year coming just around the corner, ready to hit me like a train in the next few months, and the years far ahead

It didn't hit me until a couple weeks ago how fast it was all happening and how quickly this is all coming until our teachers handed out papers and asked us what we want to do with our lives

Most everyone had a pretty good idea of what they like and how to incorporate that into their futures

Some people said that they wanted to be lawyers or astronomers or doctors and one girl even said she'd like to become a scientist; all of which our science teacher was very impressed with and wished us luck

So what exactly do you do when your teacher comes up to asking what you want to do with your life when really all you want to do is draw?

Truth is, I want to be an animator

I want to tell stories

I found out at a pretty early age that I both dearly love to tell stories and draw

And I don't tell very many people this, but I actually grew up in an art studio, where my dad was a part of a company who would tell stories through pictures or animation, sometimes bringing the children's stories they did home for me to read and ponder over. It was here where I fell in love with the art supplies and books that were constantly scattered over his office and our house.

Fast forward a few years and my dad had long since left his job as an artist and I had moved on to writing. It didn't take long for me to figure out I didn't have the patience or the skill with words to finish any of the stories I had started and eventually quit writing altogether, but still left with thousands of story ideas bouncing around in my head that I am now finally letting out through pictures.

One job that I had never even considered, where I could tell stories through pictures is animation

And now I have my heart set on it

The only problem I'm having is trying to explain to my teachers and parents that I don't want a "normal job" and that I can still make a living through art and not have to worry about money or anything. I know I'll be just fine. I just need them to believe me.

(As Dan would say, here comes the crappy profound conclusion)

To anyone else worrying about their future,

Coming from a person who does nothing but worry and panic:

don't

Everything's going to be just fine. Whether you get your current "dream job" or not. If you do, then that's fantastic. If you don't, then don't worry about it. That means there's something even better for you coming. You just have to wait. Make sensible choices while you're waiting, but just make sure to have fun in whatever stage of your life you're in right now, because just like I'm learning, it doesn't last long. Panicking is not an occupation, so don't make the mistake I did and make it one.

The future will unravel itself in time, and when it does

everything. is going to be just. fine.

I promise. :)

If my paragraph of nothingness didn't help, have some inspiration from Dan

(Which is where I got my inspiration. xD)

And just remember whenever you think that there's no way you could become successful someday, this guy was a dropout from college who didn't have a best friend the first 18 years of his life and said he hated everything about himself

And now he's an internet cult leader with Phil and they both do BBC radio 1 shows, got to host part of the Brit Awards, and was part of an Oscar Winning Disney movie

Just a thought

And now here is your typical spam of things I found on the internet while procrastinating life

I DON'T KNOW HOW MANY OF YOU HAVE SEEN THE NEW GRAVITY FALLS EPISODE BUT WOW OKAY. I WILL NEVER RECOVER FROM THAT.

make it stop I can't handle this

I feel like this sums me up pretty well

LOOK AT THIS DRAGON CAKE

someone delete this

Okay so I promised myself I'd never get back into anime again

But a friend of mine got me into RWBY, a little anime by Rooster Teeth

and can we talk about how beautiful this is

jellyfish because yes

I have this on my wall and I laugh at it every morning

me

 

IF YOU AREN'T WATCHING OVER THE GARDEN WALL YOU MUST

while you're watching things, watch this

lets take a moment to appreciate this dress

I usually don't wear dresses because they just bug me I just prefer jeans idk man

but wow dresses I could have a whole conversation about dresses

short story time so I was on the Disney website and found this thing where you can make Gravity Falls postcards with different backgrounds and stuff and I found out you can upload pictures of your own and these are just a couple of my masterpieces

if you're ever in the mood its actually kinda fun

I'm also still in the process of watching every Studio Ghibli movie ever

they're so beautiful

I love this.

WELLL I THINK THAT'S ENOUGH FOR NOW

This post was like 60% words thats the most I've ever actually written in a post besides that one new years post can I get a medal for this

HOPE YOUR LIVES HAVE BEEN GREAT AND EVERYTHING

(if not, try the postcard maker and a warm drink and also you can watch all the episodes of Kim Possible on the Disney website so just a heads up)

EAT LOTS OF PINEAPPLES AND FRUITS AND STUFF

STAY IN SCHOOL DON'T DO DRUGS

READ A MAGICAL BOOK I JUST FINISHED READING THE SEARCH FOR WONDLA AND IT WAS GREAT

and now I'm on my way to reply to all the comments on the previous post I meant to reply to a week ago hahahaha someone help me pull my life together I've been such a mess the past few days have a nice day guys

~

Anything You Say Can And Will Be Held Against You

 

So only say my name 

He's got the most fabulous hair

Wow, hi it's been a few days sorry about that.

I really haven't been busy, I just completely forgot I hadn't posted so here I am

I don't really have an excuse for not being around, I'm just a lazy butt every once and awhile and this week's kinda been my lazy butt week

Adi and I have been working on a little collab post though, so I'll use that as an excuse

And I've been answering some questions for a tag I'm posting soon, so yay. xD

Really the most exciting thing that's happened is I'm still continuing vlogging (amazingly, I thought I would have given up by now go me) and last night I was about to fall asleep when I kept hearing tiny little rustling all around my room with little squeaks every few minutes and I was freaked out because I thought it was a mouse, but when I turned on the light, I found our little hamster sitting in the middle of my bedroom floor watching me sleep. Somehow it had got out of its cage and waddled down the hall straight to my room.

I can't tell you how relieved I was that it was just our hamster and not a rat. xD

The past week and a half I've been a little sick. It wasn't bad, just a little cough and sore throat, maybe a stuffy nose here and there, but it really wasn't all that bad. But this morning, when I woke up, I found out as I tried to say good morning to everyone I had completely lost my voice.

You know when you're sick, that kind of sick where your throat hurts and you have this dry, horrible cough that won't go away, your nose is stuffed up so you can't breathe, but also whenever you try to say anything it comes out in a pitiful, scratchy whisper-y rasp kind of voice like some witch possessed you? 

I'm that kind of sick. xD

It's so infuriating trying to talk to people, but also fun at the same time since I get to sit in bed all day and read until my eyes glaze over, so I guess I really can't complain. xD

Can we talk about the fact that Lupita Nyong'o always seems to have the most gorgeous dresses at any event I feel like this needs to be talked about

Catherine Tate is so freaking important

If you haven't heard the soundtrack to The Prince of Egypt, you must.

I love Hans Zimmer's music and he did an amazing job with this

About me

If anyone's feeling bad today, have a baby polar bear  being tickled

You have no idea how much I laughed at this

I've seem to have gotten lost in the world of Disney and might just spam you guys with Disney stuff now, hope that's okay. xD

NAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

K, I'm gonna stop before I cry goodbye. xD

But seriously, Disney has always been and still is  my absolute favorite thing

(especially Winnie The Pooh)

I hope to maybe work in Disneyland someday

Or at least visit xD

this messed me up so bad

HE UNDERSTANDS. xD

THEY HAVE THEIR FULL ALBUM COMING OUT TODAY AND I CAN'T FUNCTION I CAN'T WAIT

and he's wonderful

Sassy Adam

*sobs for 20 years*

ADAAAAAMMMM

I found this around midnight last night and I snorted so loud help

THAT'S ALL FOLKS

I'll try and keep up with posting more, or just keep going with this and add more into each post, whatever works. xD

Have a lovely week, flower for you ✿

ANNNNNDDDD

EAT LOTS OF PINEAPPLES AND FRUITS DON'T GET SICK LIKE I AM

STAY IN SCHOOL AND DON'T DO DRUGS

AND READ A WONDERFUL BOOK FOR ME 

(currently rereading my entire bookshelf since I haven't been to the library in centuries)

~